Pacinofan Presents: Count Geekula's Castle

Is Blockbuster Bombing?

Count Geekula — Sun, 01 Aug 2010 02:14:52 +0000

It seems the final script for Blockbuster Video is being written. The once powerful Video rental chain that put a lot much cooler video chains out of business is not faring well against downloads and Netflix. A recent work trip took me to the good ol’ USA and I couldn’t help but notice a lot of “Going out of Business” signs in Blockbuster windows. Things seem a bit better in Canada, but chief competitor Netflix will soon be setting up virtual shop up North very soon.

http://www.theglobeandmail.com/news/technology/netflix-will-cross-border-to-canada-this-year/article1644548/

I can’t say Blockbuster doesn’t deserve it. For horror fans, they’ve always sorta sucked. All the blockbusters near me don’t even have a proper Horror section (they’ve lumped everything in Action, Drama, or Comedy). I’m pretty sure they don’t even carry films made before 2005. Let’s also not forget the serious lack of pornography (wimps). A lot of kick ass video stores were done in by the Blockbuster chain. These were the Mom n’ Pop shops that featured cool horror sections (often times in separate rooms done up to look like torture chambers and such) that featured obscure titles from long dead companies such Vestron and Prism.

For Horror fans of the 50′s and 60′s, it was the Drive in that provided some the best memories. In the 70′s and early 80′s, it was the Grind House. For me, in the late 80′s, it was the Video Store. VHS was the format that introduced me to the films of Lucio Fulci, Texas Chainsaw Masscare, Dawn of The Dead, Evil Dead, and a whole lot of other movies with “dead” in the title. Blockbuster had a decent selection of horror titles in the early days, but they eventually abandoned anything that was too obscure.

They’ve also had some weird policies. There “No late fees” was a disaster that only lead to really pissing people off when they (very quietly) brought them back. It’s not like people don’t rent movies anymore. Blockbuster still seems packed on the weekends, but they clearly aren’t renting like they used too, and the chain just doesn’t seem to know how to adapt.

On the bright side, they are selling a lot of previously viewed movies for cheap, even Blu Ray. Actually, I could write a whole other blog on how over priced Blu Ray movies are right now and how that hurts a new format trying to compete with free illegal down loads, but I’ve already rambled enough.

Returning to Return to Sleepaway Camp: The Return

Count Geekula — Sat, 24 Jul 2010 16:52:29 +0000

So I finished RTSC during the wee hours of the morning. The final verdict? Well, it’s clearly a terrible movie. The dialogue is atrocious, the pacing all the over the place and there’s nary an exposed breast to be found (although there is a brief glimpse of a severed penis, not sure how I feel about that). It does feature, however, some pretty dang nasty kills (see penis, severed) and I appreciate the fact that they managed to scrounge up all the survivors from the original film.

If you watch the behind the scenes featurette and cast interviews on the DVD, you realize all involved honestly believe they made a good film. With quotes like “When I put on the sheriff Jerry costume… I become him” and “the character of Ronnie is really expanded on” you realize that everyone tried really hard and are proud of the film they made. There are moments when I thought the movie was a thinly veiled spoof (did they really want me to tale Sheriff Jerry seriously?) but I do believe that this was a sincere attempt at making a horror film, and for that I give credit.

I can’t really recommend Return To Camp Sleepaway Camp, but I can say watching it won’t cause blindness. Also, Grown Up Angela is actually kind of hot. Had we had an updated full frontal shot to end the film I would have given it a much more positive review. Revenge Of Camp Sleepaway Camp anyone? Anyone? Okay then…

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RdNKR1j6l90

Return To Sleepaway Camp

Count Geekula — Sat, 24 Jul 2010 06:02:07 +0000

I’m less than 15 minutes in to Return To Sleepaway Camp and all I can say is…WTF

This is inept filmmaking at its, um, ineptest. Even something as simple as a scene transitiuon is handled with all the skill of Ryan Seacrest trying to act Hetero. And the acting, oh Lord in Heaven the acting. The performances are, to be kind, rather broad. The mainly teenaged cast tries hard, but even the hardest working one-legged runner ‘aint gonna win a race.

I’m not exactly sure which characters I’m supposed to be rooting for. I’ve seen more likeable casts in snuff films. I mean, the “hero” seems to be a dimwitted bully that, when not being picked on, picks on the kids that are even bigger losers than he is. His catch phrase also happens to be ”Your ass stinks” which makes me cringe so hard I break a tooth every time he says it.

I’m gonna go out on a limb and say the remaining 75 minutes don’t get a whole heck of a lot better. The original Sleepaway Camp was no cinematic act of God either, but at least that has the benefit of 80′s horror nostalgia.

Update 1: I have to admit, the first kill was a pretty a mean-spirited death by deep fryer.

Update 2: Okay, 30 minutes in and we’ve had another decent murder. This flick is much closer in tone to the original Sleepaway Camp then the intentionally cheesy and spoofesque Parts 2 AND 3. Not surprising since original director Robert Hiltzik is back behind the camera and brings with him much of the cast from the first film. It actually claims to be the only “real” sequel.

Update 3: Okay, were an hour in and we are one gratuitous nude scene away from this thing being considered watchable… terrible but watchable.

Brad Pitt to star in World War Z?

Count Geekula — Thu, 22 Jul 2010 17:29:52 +0000

This is far from confirmed, but WWZ author (and spawn of Mel) Max Brooks has stated that Brad Pitt will star in the big screen adaptation of his Zombie opus:

http://www.aintitcool.com/node/45858

Pitt is no Boris Karloff, but he’s not a complete Horror virgin either. He starred in Interview With A Vampire and pseudo horror flicks SE7EN and the grossly underrated Kalifornia.

Pitt very well may end up being the biggest Hollywood star to ever appear in a Zombie movie. He is, however, the member of Brangelina I’d least want to have sex with.

Customized…

Count Geekula — Thu, 22 Jul 2010 02:30:54 +0000

My geekiness knows no bounds. Yes, there are few things dorkier than making your own custom action figures. I’m not judging, I’m one of those dorks. Take a look at some customized member’s of Canada’s premier Super hero team, Alpha Flight!!!

There has been syrup-sucking lack of alpha Flight Figs. We did get some decent 5 inch figures from Toy Biz a few years back, but 5 inch figures are for losers! The Legendary Marvel Legends line had three Alphans: Sasquatch, Wolverine (many, many Wolverines) and Guardian. We also have a Guardian in the 3/4 inch line (and again, many, many Wolverines).

I made these figures a few years ago (sans Sasquatch which is an official fig, hence why it’s so much better than my crappy ones). I’d had several eye surgeries (5 to be exact) and was off work for several months. What was a one-eyed geek to do but enter custom action figures in Cuctom Con? For pics and info, see the links below:

http://www.joeacevedo.com/docs/customzone/customcon/customcon18/d2pacinofan1.htm

http://www.toymania.com/customcorner/cc19/depth.shtml

Is it a dream within a dream within a dream within a dream? Nope, originality sells!

Count Geekula — Tue, 20 Jul 2010 22:54:20 +0000

Seriously, we should all collectively thank James Cameron and Christopher Nolan for proving that blockbusters don’t have to be remakes or sequels. Despite the fact that the studios tend to think movie goers have the IQ and attention span of Larry and his two brothers named Darryl, Inception manged to be a an original high concept film that still made mondo cash.

Cameron’s Avatar managed to be one of the biggest money makers of all time and didn’t even need to be called Titanic II. Granted, I’m sure some whiny fan boy is making a crack about just how original Avatar really was, but ignore that thought for now.

Typically Hollywood likes to recycle ideas that are succesful, so hopefully this crazy “originality” idea catches on.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=T6ravRfW_00

Kovalsucks

Count Geekula — Mon, 19 Jul 2010 18:12:44 +0000

I am a movie geek, comic geek, horror geek, and an MMA geek. I am also a Hockey geek, specifically a Toronto Maple Leaf geek.

Apparently the notoriously cheap Devils resigned the notoriously expensive Ilya Kovalchuk.

My question is: Did the Leafs even make an attempt to sign him?!?!?! Apparently only the Kings and the Devils (and the cess pool that is the KHL) were in the running.

http://slam.canoe.ca/Slam/Hockey/NHL/NewJersey/2010/07/19/14756636.html

Greatest worst movie ever… Konga!

Count Geekula — Mon, 19 Jul 2010 03:28:59 +0000

Featuring giant creature effects so bad Ray Harryhausen probably felt like Ned Beatty in Deliverance, Konga has my vote for best worst movie. The story of a mad scientist that turns his pet chimpanzee in to a dude in a cheap gorilla suit has so many unintentional funny moments I’d swear it was written by Mark Borchardt*. Of all the King Kong rip off’s made, this is my favorite.

Just a terrible, terrible film that never once had me feeling bored. Take that, Troll II!

*http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=P7N2Jz1en4w

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=irdO28pI-cE

Comics: The Movie(s)

Count Geekula — Mon, 19 Jul 2010 02:25:16 +0000

There’s been a lot of Super Hero Movie news over the past week, so in an effort get some cheap hits on the blog, I’ll recap for you:

Ed Norton is apparently out of the Avengers movie. This sucks for a couple of reasons, mainly for continuity sakes. If Marvel Studios wants to have this whole comic book movie universe, they really shouldn’t really be this much recasting of major roles. I love Don Cheadle, but I would have much rather Terrence Howard reprised his role of James Rhodes in Iron Man 2 just for continuity sake. To make matters ever so slightly worse, the studio suits have hinted (non too subtly) that the reason Norton won’t be back was ’cause he was a pain to work with. Not surprisingly, Norton’s people counter-bitched and denied any such claims. the whole thing is a rather messy divorce. Keep in kind Marvel almost lost out on Samuel L. Jackson reprising his Nick Fury role in future Marvel movies (including Avengers) due to a low ball contract offer. If their not careful, it’ll be the studio that get’s the reputation of being difficult to work with. For some better written perspectives, see the links below:

http://www.aintitcool.com/node/45732

http://spinoff.comicbookresources.com/2010/07/17/whats-with-marvel-alienating-actors/

Marvel stated they were gonna go w/ an unknown actor as Banner, but now there’s a rumor Mark Ruffalo is being considered. I think he’s a great, but I would have much rather seen Norton reprise the role.

The other big comic book news last week was the Entertainment Weekly cover of Ryan Reynolds as Green Lantern:

http://io9.com/5587996/ryan-reynolds-green-lantern-costume-revealed

I have no problems w/ that look. It’s hard to really tell just how comic accurate it is, but from what I can discern, it’s ‘aight.

Crisis On Middle Earth

Count Geekula — Wed, 14 Jul 2010 23:37:45 +0000

The joys of the Canadian specialty Channel Teletoon Retro. Each night I get to watch the awesome crappiness of The Super Friends. Just got finished watching one of my all time fave episodes. It’s basically a Super friends/Lord of the Rings cross over. Some how our heroes are transported to “Middle Earth” (actually called that) and are then turned in to Hobbits (not called that in the show, but its pretty obvious that’s what they are). There’s an evil wizard, a good King, some monsters and of course a magical ring. For no good reason ***SPOILER ALERT*** the whole thing turns out to be dream by Gleek. Well, at least he was good for something.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VOcfkAAiy7I